The third time IS a charm
the wedding went with only a few glitches
my dress was beautiful. my hair worth the $40.00 i spent to get it up.
an extremely short man sat down beside me and tried to pick me up.
a kind yet odd man offered to and did drive to the gas station to pick me up some antacids. i had eaten 10-12 thick watermelon slices. yummy, but ouch. afterward, he asked me to dance only to paw me. even the bride's mother (who isn't the sort) was laughing at my attempts to disengage.
the disc jockey hit on me, which wouldn't have been so bad. he's older, handsome, and thick-bodied. But, half-way through the night i learned that the lady helping him was his girlfriend. see ? told ya.
the groomsman with whom i walked down the aisle asked me why i was still single. i told him that only married or gay men strike up conversation with me. in a teasing tone, he asked what was wrong with me. i laughed and told him that was the very question i ask myself. he said they were probably afraid. that's three opinions, almost enough to consider the validity of the hypothesis. if it is, in fact, the case...i guess i may have to start being more proactive about finding someone to share my life. are there classes i can enroll in ? you know, twenty years ago, that would have been funnier. nowadays, if that question were posed, there'd be a line at my door for people willing to show me how to, shall we say for lack of a better phrase, "pick up a man." sad.
okay. my piggies hurt. my head feels like stuffed cotton...it's 2:42 a.m. U.S. eastern standard time and I have a full day ahead of me.
nighty. night.
my dress was beautiful. my hair worth the $40.00 i spent to get it up.
an extremely short man sat down beside me and tried to pick me up.
a kind yet odd man offered to and did drive to the gas station to pick me up some antacids. i had eaten 10-12 thick watermelon slices. yummy, but ouch. afterward, he asked me to dance only to paw me. even the bride's mother (who isn't the sort) was laughing at my attempts to disengage.
the disc jockey hit on me, which wouldn't have been so bad. he's older, handsome, and thick-bodied. But, half-way through the night i learned that the lady helping him was his girlfriend. see ? told ya.
the groomsman with whom i walked down the aisle asked me why i was still single. i told him that only married or gay men strike up conversation with me. in a teasing tone, he asked what was wrong with me. i laughed and told him that was the very question i ask myself. he said they were probably afraid. that's three opinions, almost enough to consider the validity of the hypothesis. if it is, in fact, the case...i guess i may have to start being more proactive about finding someone to share my life. are there classes i can enroll in ? you know, twenty years ago, that would have been funnier. nowadays, if that question were posed, there'd be a line at my door for people willing to show me how to, shall we say for lack of a better phrase, "pick up a man." sad.
okay. my piggies hurt. my head feels like stuffed cotton...it's 2:42 a.m. U.S. eastern standard time and I have a full day ahead of me.
nighty. night.
posted by Morgue | 7/24/2005 01:34:00 AM
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