Sunday, August 07, 2005

New Wheels & Used Car Salesmen

Some married guy is chasing my friend who isn't running fast enough.

I was thinking as I took a piss in her bathroom this evening that a woman is said to be 'morally loose,' if she screwed around with someone else's husband. With that, came the thought that I had once been considered the same.

I told myself, "Well, I was in love...passionately, completely, desperately, in love."

The kind of love that didn't make any sense. Where so many of this man's traits would set me to vibrate. One, however, I would not allow myself to see and finally couldn't bear any longer for what havoc it wreaked on my life. His lack of character. His inability to do the things he said he would do. The situation was smarmy, really. On his end (for obvious reasons) and mine. Mine for continuing to have him in my life simply to feel that 'utter-ness.' A whole "Into you and just you"thing. A "seeing other beautiful people and still only wanting one"thing.

I was a huge schmuck for several years.
Again, I try to explain it to myself: The intensity of it hooked me.
1.I was deprived prior to the affair;
2.The taboo factor, which always plays a part, and;
3.(The one that kept me there too frickin long)...Not wanting to let go of someone who pleases you. Not only physically, but mentally. A nice duo.

Guess what ! I've now learned of a possible trinity. Physically, mentally, AND emotionally. Who woulda thought ? Hmmm...

Oh, yeah...I bought a car today. A newer one. Purported to have excellent gas mileage. That's my speed. And my dear old friend insisted the salesmen take us out to dinner. They did, with aplomb. I ate shrimp cocktail and drank two Amber Bock. Had a few laughs and gave some. I love giving one liners and walking away hearing people guffaw behind me. That's always a pleasure.

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